This was a post intended for one of our other sites. But this topic comes up a lot on AoZ. So, I thought I would write a Wild-specific version, and a more general version later.

“And the fear goes on shadows
And the tear flows on for nothing…”

Howard Jones

 

“….but I’m scared” is something I hear a lot. “I want to get verified, but I’m scared”. “I want to make movies, but I’m scared”. “Please delete my account, because I’m scared”. The list goes on. And on, and on.

Now people. Life is a scary place. War, poverty, oppression, abuse – murder, rape, disease – every day the news is filled with shit designed specifically to keep you scared. Because, while you are scared, you will sprint toward the imaginary protection of a corrupt government like an Olympic event. Knowing full well that, behind that door is not safety at all. Like cows heading toward the abattoir.

Yes you should be scared. You think I’m not scared, every day? In my world, any shit can happen, at any time. Not just with the Wild stuff, haters, assholes, and authorities who would like nothing better than seeing me out of the picture. But with people I deal with harshly offline, dangerous groups I am involved with, and fuck knows what else. 1% of some of the shit I have to deal with, would send most people shitting their shorts and fleeing to the hills.

And yet, here I am. Am I magic? Am I insane? Well, maybe a bit. But that is not the reason I am sitting here, and most others are not.

Fearless is not the absence of fear. I used to box semi professionally as a young man. My boxing coach pointed out that, in the ring, surrounded by an audience of friends, family and others – faced with another guy who’s intention it is to smash my face in – this is scary. That I will feel fear. And yet, the thing to always remember, is that, no matter how tough the other guy appears, he is feeling exactly the same thing. If he doesn’t, then there is something psychologically wrong with him, and he has no place in a boxing ring, rather, some kind of mental institution. Even so, just because someone is psychopathic, doesn’t mean you can’t still kick their ass. Invincible Mike Tyson has been put on his ass a number of times. There is always a higher mountain.

We overcome Fear with understanding. We never get rid of Fear. Fear is a powerful force that we use to drive us forward. Like 6 powerful stallions pulling us into the future. We could cut them loose, and sit there scratching our asses. Or, we can yell ‘giddyup’ and tear off into the sunset. One of these paths is interesting.

When faced with an attacker on the street, the inexperienced fighter will often ‘freeze up’. Some of you will have experienced this. Attackers know this. This is why they know exactly who to prey on, and who to avoid. Sometimes, if the mood takes me, I go out to real dodgy areas and try to look as meek and scared as possible in the hope that some foolish fuck will chance his arm. Still, they avoid me like the plague, the fuckers.

Still, in my early days, I used to freeze up, same as everyone else. I’ve been punched and kicked in the face, knocked out, stabbed, you name it. So, I am no stranger to ‘being scared’. What is different between me, and perhaps you, is that I have learned to Master and control my Fear, and use it, instead of allowing it to control me.

“It is not fear that grips him … only a heightened sense of things.”

Dilios from 300

 

That rush of ‘Fear’ that you feel in dangerous situations (or, imagined dangerous situations). That isn’t Fear. Fear is just a word to describe a set of physical responses. That rush, is actually just adrenaline pumping into your veins. Adrenaline is your fight or flight mechanism. It makes you run faster, or fight harder. It makes your brain – and subsequently your body – move faster, stronger. It blocks out pain, so you can take a kicking and not even notice it. It shuts down your logical thought, making you into an animal. A brain operating faster, means you can, with practice, actually slow down time. Some of you may have experienced this, perhaps during a car accident – Time Bending is a real problem for the other guy. Adrenaline turns you from an average person, into a Superman. Or Woman.

And yet. When first faced with this ‘adrenaline dump’ – people panic. What the fuck is this? My brain is not working. I am shaking. My mouth is dry. I can’t move. This must be Fear, right? No, it’s just adrenaline, that’s all.

First step, do something. Anything. Scream. Lash out. Run. Then you start to see that, actually, you are not powerless. Quite the opposite. Bit by bit, you learn to work through the adrenaline, and then to use it. Then you ride it, like a big old wave – sailing headlong and through that guy who wants to push his luck. He goes through the wall, and you roar like a Lion. Or three. At that point, people really don’t want to fuck with you. Life becomes safer. You stop watching stupid news channels, and watch an educational documentary about nature instead. Little things that used to scare you, now seem like flecks of dust.

“Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness”.

The Desiderata

 

I used to be afraid to talk to women. My first attempts at talking to women, my God. Bluh blll bllur uuh err **Blushes**. As you can imagine, I did not get very far. But I practiced, and practiced. Until, I could walk up to any woman, anywhere at any time, and chance my arm. Again, one of these roads is interesting. So all you guys who keep telling me you are nervous to talk to women. Just get the fuck out there and practice. Doesn’t matter what you look like. Just practice, I guarantee you will get it. Because – ask any Lady – good looks, nice clothes, money, etc. These are all interesting for a Lady. But what really floats a Ladys boat, is confidence. Confidence is just a matter of practice and experience. Master that, you Own the room. And you will be beating Ladies off with a stick. Sorry about that stick Ladies, I know you love it really 😉

As for the rest of you. I am quite aware of people who are scared, and people who are full of shit. “I am scared to get verified”. Scared of what? That I will jump down the video feed and bite your ass off? Scared I will send photos of your boobs to the police, and them track you down with their boobs tracking system? Or, is it perhaps you are not scared at all, but instead, just another dude wasting my time pretending to be a female and thinking you can worm your way around our systems. Don’t waste YOUR time, I ain’t new to this.

Same with making movies. This is the Wild. Making movies takes balls, Lady balls too. Scared has no place in Pet Production. So, if you are scared, better to not even inquire about it. Or, grow a pair first, THEN apply.

I have a nice young couple, at the time of writing this, who are about to make their first movie. They are nervous, of course, it’s a new unknown experience. And nothing is more scary than the unknown. Still, are they letting this stand in the way of their dreams and goals? Fuck no. And, they will reap the benefits of tearing through Fear like the Hulk on PCP.

So Gang. I want to see a lot less ‘I’m scared’ in future. We are Children of The Wild, this is The Jungle. Fearless is the hallmark of a true Wild. Shoot for that eh, life will be a much happier place if you do.

Thanks for reading. And, read Geoff Thompsons seminal work on Fear, for more information.

 

 

 

Published in Bits & Pieces
5 Comments
  1. 1peterpan 1 month ago

    Hi Adam.

    It is very well written.
    We life in a mainstream world, where 99,5 % is afraid to step out off the line, but the line is just created to keep people in control and keep on production.
    And the reality is that fear (ore whatever we want to call it) can be your friend or your enemy, all depending on how you tread it, it can make your rational or irrational.
    When i ask my wife if we should get verified there was no doubt in here mind, and she just said YES, and she did that for more reason.
    1. Being verified means that you can get connection with the right (real) petlover
    2. She knows the writing on my chest, and what it means, and that there is no limits for what i will do to protect her.
    And my wife is a very smart woman, and knows that you are not doing something illegal by getting verified.
    To have a fantasi is good, but if you don’t try to life it out, you never know.
    Hugs.
    T&M

  2. janni 1 month ago

    spot on,,,you hits me in my heart.

  3. er1c 1 month ago

    Zoo friends, just to add my little bit to it … Adam knows me (virtually) since 2006 or something, when I emailed him my ID, driving license and such, as I wanted to volunteer for ZooSchool, he asked me for “proof” of me being me. I have been following ZS for so long, I didn’t hesitate to email him with the paperwork.
    The volunteering didn’t happen as my job proved to be more demanding than I though, but still, he knows very well who I am.
    At the time, my friend who I initiated to zoo wanted to make movies, I certainly didn’t hesitated to link her with Adam either. She was 26 or 28 at the time and trusted me on my word.

  4. therealsuperbitch 1 month ago

    Thank you, Adam, you’ve provided a wonderful article that will help many people deal with Fear. Fear can paralyze us, but we should never let it control our lives. Keep safe, but never let fear stop you from living.

    “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.”
    ― Franklin D. Roosevelt
    https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/172689-courage-is-not-the-absence-of-fear-but-rather-the

    I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. Nelson Mandela
    https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/nelson_mandela_178789

    • Author
      adam 1 month ago

      Great quotes Lady, and exactly on point. Like a lusty hound flying into that nice doggybox of yours 😉 x

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